Screen Time in Expat Families
Moving to a new country is a profound experience for any family, and for children, it can be especially challenging. Alongside the excitement of discovery comes uncertainty, loss of familiar routines, and the need to adapt to a new language and culture. In this time of transition, screens often become both a comfort and a concern for expat parents. Whether it’s cartoons in the family’s native language, video calls with friends back home, or games that fill lonely hours, digital devices can seem like a lifeline. Yet, many parents wonder: Does screen time help my child cope, or does it keep them from integrating into their new world?
Why Screens Feel Safe – and When They Can Hinder Adaptation
It’s completely natural for children to seek comfort in what’s familiar. Screens can quickly become a “safe zone”—a place where language, content, and even friends remain unchanged, no matter how much the outside world shifts.
“When we first moved to Germany, my 8-year-old son spent hours watching his favorite Polish YouTubers. He said it was the only time he didn’t feel like a stranger.” – Parent in my practice
From a psychological perspective, this retreat is a coping strategy. Screens offer predictability and control during a phase filled with unknowns. For many expat kids, digital content in their native tongue temporarily soothes homesickness and anxiety.
However, there’s a flip side: excess screen time can become a barrier to social integration. Instead of exploring local parks, joining after-school activities, or practicing a new language, children may withdraw into the digital world. Over time, this may delay adaptation and lead to feelings of isolation.
Understanding the Brain: Comfort vs. Growth
The human brain is wired to seek comfort and avoid stress. When a child is overwhelmed by a foreign language or unfamiliar social cues, their brain naturally gravitates towards what feels safe—often, that’s a screen. But real adaptation happens when children engage with their new environment, experiencing small successes (and sometimes failures) that build confidence and resilience.
In short, comfort zones are essential, but they shouldn’t become hiding places. The goal isn’t to eliminate screens, but to use them as a bridge to new experiences, not a wall that keeps the world out.
Practical Steps for Parents: Finding the Balance
Every family is unique, and there’s no single “right” rule for screen time in expat life. But here are some practical steps you can take:
1. Start with Observation, Not Guilt
Many parents feel guilty about increased screen time, especially during stressful moves. Instead of blaming yourself, observe:
- When does your child gravitate to screens most?
- What content do they choose?
- How do they feel before and after screen use?
This information will help you understand whether screens are being used for healthy comfort, social connection, or avoidance.
2. Co-View and Co-Play
If possible, spend time with your child during screen activities. Watching shows together or playing video games can open up conversations about feelings, language, and cultural differences. You can gently introduce local content or use a favorite show as a springboard for discussion.
One family I worked with started watching a popular British cartoon dubbed in their native language, then gradually switched to English. It became a fun family project, and their daughter began repeating new words at school.
3. Set Clear (but Flexible) Screen Boundaries
Structure is reassuring for children, especially during transitions. Agree on daily or weekly limits together, taking into account:
- School and homework time
- Time outdoors or in social settings
- Family meals and routines
Remember, some days will be harder than others—flexibility is key. If your child is having a tough day, a little extra screen comfort is okay. The goal is overall balance, not perfection.
4. Use Screens as a Bridge, Not a Barrier
Look for ways to connect screen time to the local culture:
- Find local cartoons, games, or YouTube channels—even if you watch together and pause to explain.
- Set up video calls with classmates or new friends, not just relatives back home.
- Use apps that encourage language learning or discovery of your new city.
This approach helps your child associate screens with exploration rather than just retreat.
Checklist: What to Try This Week
| Strategy | How to Apply | Notes/Examples |
|---|---|---|
| Track Screen Habits | Keep a simple log for 3-5 days | Note time, type of content, and mood before/after |
| Family Screen Time | Plan one shared screen activity | Try a local cartoon or a game in the new language |
| Offline Adventures | Replace one screen session with an outdoor or cultural activity | Visit a park, museum, or join a local event |
| Connect with Peers | Arrange a video chat or playdate with a new friend | Encourage using both the native and local language |
| Review and Adjust | Discuss as a family what worked and what didn’t | Stay open to change as everyone adapts |
Mini-Case: From Isolation to Involvement
*A 10-year-old girl from Turkey, recently relocated to the Netherlands, refused to attend local clubs and spent most afternoons on her tablet. After her parents started watching Dutch children’s shows together and visited a local science center based on a program they watched, she gradually agreed to join a school club. Her screen time remained, but its role shifted from escape to exploration.*
Useful Resources
- Common Sense Media – Reviews and advice for age-appropriate content in multiple languages
- Child Mind Institute – Tips on screen time and adjustment
- Expatica – Expat family guides and local resources
- UNICEF Parenting Hub – Guidance on digital media and adaptation
Remember: Every transition is different. Some children adapt quickly; others need more time and support. Screens are not “the enemy”—but with mindful guidance, they can become tools for comfort, learning, and connection in your family’s new adventure.
Disclaimer: This article provides general psychological guidance and is not a substitute for personal consultation with a licensed professional.
Поняла, статья завершена.
